MIdlife: A Crisis OR Pivot?

May 15, 2019

If you do a Google search using the word midlife, what do you think pops up first? Crisis! Yup, midlife crisis is a highly searchable term and one that, I believe, should not exist.

 

Your life in the middle is not a crisis - you may not believe that, but that's okay, you don't have to believe. Keep reading.

 

After I survived eight years of perimenopause (H.E.L.L.), and after I turned 50, I began to experience this feeling of holy shit, I better get going!

 

I think that is why most people (including myself a couple of years ago) think of the middle of life as a crisis because you begin to think about mortality and dreams lost and you feel hopeless and stuck. 

 

You are not hopeless and being stuck is a choice.  

 

I had two roads in front of me - one was the road of comfort and complacency, and the other was the road of excitement and experimentation, and the terrifying unknown.

 

I chose the latter.

 

I had been there done that with complacency and comfort in my life for over three decades, I knew I was born for more and that I wouldn't do myself any favors if I stayed stuck in the same spot.

 

Sound familiar?

 

You know you are born for more - you think about it all day long and hope that someday you will get out of your current situation and start living your dream life, but you keep talking yourself out of it.

 

I get it - that was me for so long. I held tight to the untruth that I told myself that life is for other people, not me. I focused on I can't do this, that won't work for me instead of what I focus on today, it will work and why not me?!

 

Your mindset in the middle of life is made up of your past behavior's and experiences (both good and bad) and, let's face it, some bull-shit stories that you still believe are true.

 

For example: 

 

I tried to go after my dream in 1985, but it didn't work; I failed. Oh well, that ship has sailed, it's too late now.

 

Stop, please!  It's never too late! I don't care if you're thirty or eighty, as long as you are not dead, you can do anything you want.

 

You need to PIVOT.

 

Turn the wheel towards the road less traveled and start going after your dreams. Shake it UP and get excited by all of the possibilities and hope and experiences that are lining that road ahead. 

 

You can view your life as a crisis that you have resigned to believe in OR you can start changing your thoughts and behaviors to pivot towards a life you are not willing to leave on the table.  

 

Are you with me?  

 

I'm getting chills just typing this!

 

I'm excited about who I will meet and what I will do next year at this time because I have big dreams! Am I scared? Yes, but that means I'm ALIVE. Between you and I, I'm terrified of laying on my death bed filled with regrets.

 

Failure, experimentation, challenging myself - those things aren't scary compared to regret.

 

Challenge yourself to fail repeatedly and learn from it.  You are a big girl now, you have everything you need - wisdom, experience, and smarts - don't back down to failure, that's just a bump in the road. 

 

Now, tell me what is your biggest dream in life and how will you pivot towards that dream today? 

 

 

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