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Navigating Marriage, Society and Boredom in Sobriety

to 50 and beyond podcast Oct 13, 2020

Navigating marriage Society, alcohol pushers, and boredom in sobriety take a lot of grit and patience. When I quit drinking in 2013, my husband supported me by stopping also. Even though I had his support, it was still hard. 

If you are a woman over 40 and you're resisting getting sober because your husband or partner drinks or society and friends are pushing you into drinking, then this is the episode for you. 

In this episode, I share how alcohol affected my life as a mother and wife and how I navigated my relationships after I quit drinking. A lot of those relationships were built on alcohol, including my marriage. 

When relationships are glued together because of alcohol and drinking, and one person decides to change, it's very hard, in the beginning, to be on the same page. It's essential for you if you are sober, and someone like your husband or partner is still drinking that you don't try to control their drinking, and you stay in your lane. 

By creating boundaries in your relationships and speaking up and sharing the fact that this is my goal and I'm not drinking anymore can you please respect my decision, will lessen the worry you have about being pushed into drinking.

Alcohol pushers like to enable you to drink and tell you that it's okay; you can have just one. Tap into your self-awareness when this happens and decide can I have only one, or do I want to have one? 

No one can dictate how you drink or what is right for you except yourself. 

When I quit drinking, even though my husband supported me, he said to me, you don't need to stop drinking; you're okay. After about 90-days of sobriety, he changed his tune. 

You don't know what life is like sober vs. drinking until you get sober and allow yourself to reap the benefits.

So if you're met with other people's opinions about what you should and shouldn't do in your drinking and the fact that you don't have a problem, please remind yourself why you want to stay sober.

If anyone will ask you about your drinking or push you into drinking, that is 100% about them, not you. People will either support you, cheer for you or distance themselves you from, and either way, you will be a-okay.

Lastly, if you are bored and sobriety, I want you to look at the facts that boredom and alcohol don't go together; they are separate. If you are bored because you're not drinking alcohol, there is something else going on, and typically, boredom is an excuse. 

Find new adventures and creative endeavors to keep you busy and remember why alcohol isn't fun or exciting: hangovers, barely functioning days, regrets, wasted money, and time. 

You deserve a life that is present and clear, peaceful, and fun alcohol-free. 

 

Topics discussed in Episode 134: 

  • How I met my husband and how we drank together
  • The truth about my drinking and how I acted towards my husband
  • How to navigate a relationship that was built on alcohol
  • How to speak up for yourself when other people are telling you you can have just one it's okay
  • The story of when I had my son and came home from the hospital thinking I would not drink again
  • How to view social media and drinking memes
  • Losing relationships because you're sober and how to deal 
  • Boredom is an excuse and has nothing to do with alcohol

 

You can listen to the episode here.

 

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