Sober Gal Summer: What’s In andWhat’s Out
This episode is for the Sober Gal who wants to spend her summer with that Sober Gal vibe - freedom from alcohol.
Freedom to do more things SHE wants to do.
Invest and give herself back the time, money, and energy alcohol took from her and have fun on her own this summer - no alcohol required.
➡️Do you feel like you’re missing out because you don’t have a glass of alcohol when you’re sitting on your patio?
➡️Are you starting to give yourself a summer pass for drinking because you’re on vacation?
➡️Saying things like - I’m traveling internationally; alcohol doesn’t count?
➡️Are you doubtful that you will be able to show up at BBQs and get-togethers and say, I’m not drinking?
I totally get it! I felt this way when I stopped drinking in August of 2013.
But hold up before you grant yourself a drinking pass because it’s summer, and listen in while I share what’s in and out for Sober Gals during our one-and-only summer of 2024.
I had the same summer experience for decades and I didn’t realize it until I stopped drinking.
Different year. Same old stuff. Alcohol-centered, not me-centered that is why I’m creating the very first Sober Gal Summer in 2024!
What you’ll hear:
An explanation of what it means to have a Sober Gal Summer: it’s a mindset, an attitude, and a celebration of elevated self-care regimes and rewards. Both tangible and intangible. Think freedom, peace, and being present.
Why summer is a challenging time to stay sober for most midlife women
A list of What’s In and What’s Out for Sober Gals this summer (hint: what’s in: pleasing ourselves first)
How to create your In and Out Sober Gal Summer list by using my free download.
My mission to bring our midlife community together this summer to build more confidence in ourselves and our choice to be free from alcohol.
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[00:00:00] Hey there, my friend, welcome to To 50 and Beyond. I am Lori Massicot. I'm the Midlife Sobriety Coach, creator of the Daily Sobriety Toolkit, and founder of the team, Team Alcohol Free. I am so happy to be here with you today. This is your first episode tuning in. Welcome my friend. And if you're returning back, thanks so much for coming back.
This episode is for the sober gal who wants to spend her summer with that sober gal vibe, freedom from alcohol, freedom to do more things she wants to do, invest in herself, give herself back the time and money and energy alcohol took from her and have fun. On her own this summer, no alcohol required. If you feel like you're missing out because you don't have a glass of alcohol while you're sitting on your patio, I totally get it.
If you feel like you're starting to give yourself a summer pass for drinking because you're on vacation saying things like, I'm traveling, alcohol doesn't count. I get it. [00:01:00] And if you're feeling doubtful that you're going to be able to go to the 4th of July barbecue and show up and say, I am not drinking.
I feel it. I totally understand how you feel, but I want you to hold up before you grant yourself a drinking pass because it's summer. And listen in while I share what's in and out for sober gals during our one and only summer of 2024. I had the same summer experience for decades and I didn't realize it until I stopped drinking.
Same old stuff, alcohol centered, not me centered. And that is why I have created the very first sober gal summer in 2024. I was thinking of how I could bring our community together here on the podcast and inside my community team, alcohol free, and have a mission to work on ourselves, project us, and. I feel it.
And I feel it the summer, especially because the last couple of summers, I've been very focused on work. I've been focused on a lot of family stuff, which is great, [00:02:00] not focused on Lori's. This is why I have declared 2024 the summer of Lori and how can we do this together? So let me introduce you to the mission of sober gal summer.
And I want to share with you that I have created for you a PDF. It's free. You download it. You don't have to sign up for email or anything. It's Download it, print it out, get that sober gal summer vibe going and create your own in and out list. You could do it now while I'm talking, or you can come back to this episode later, or you can just take it and go with you and create your in and out list on your own.
Sober Gal Summer is very, very loosely based on Hot Girl Summer, which is a song. Originally created by Megan, the stallion. I don't know anything about Megan. I've never listened to the song, but there was this trend going around. I don't know if it's still going around on Tik TOK. And I want to say a few years ago for the younger gals, and it's called hot girl summer.
The basic definition of hot girl summer is feeling confident in who you [00:03:00] are and feeling good about yourself. Strutting yourself. There are hot girl summer walks and it's aimed towards younger than us. Girls. But you could do it at any age. And this is where I got the idea. So supper gals summer is just for midlife and beyond gals.
The over 35 group, why summer? The summer season can be a real conundrum to staying sober. There are women that I have talked to throughout the years. They're going strong that first part of the year, but the moment the season start to change, it's really tough. And so this is why I want us all to come together.
We're not getting this 2024 summer back. When we think about the good old days, we're going to be thinking about this summer. Let's make this summer about us, not alcohol. And think about how many summers you have spent drinking alcohol. No judgment here. Please know this. One is enough. How about [00:04:00] 29 ish?
Mmm. That's my number because I'm considering when I was pregnant, it was the only summer that I didn't drink. Um, that was probably only partial summer. I had my last drinking summer in 2013, which is also the first partial summer I spent sober. One of my biggest associations with summer and alcohol is outdoor concerts.
I stopped drinking August 11th. On July 31st, I went with my husband and some of my friends to a kid rock concert, only focused on drinking alcohol. Sure, I wanted to see Kid Rock. Was that my first time seeing Kid Rock? No, I think I'd seen him before. I was only focused on drinking and getting drunk. And that's what my husband was focused on too.
We got a hotel, so we wouldn't be driving. It was one of the worst concert experiences I ever had. Is that one of the experiences that led me to quit drinking? Yeah, I would say that was a definitely a rock bottom moment [00:05:00] for me, that whole experience and not to get into it, but it was one of the toughest nights my husband and I had ever had together and yeah, I added it to my list and that's ultimately I quit drinking August 11th.
So a couple of weeks later, summers equaled alcohol and that was starting. As a teenager, I know how many associations there are with drinking and summer. These associations change when we decide to change them. And so for gals are changing them. The summer, these associations are real. Validate how you feel about these associations and know that staying alcohol free this summer is one of the most empowering things you can do to change the associations with summer and alcohol.
It's badass. Sober Gal Summer is all about building more confidence in yourself and your choice to be alcohol free and treating yourself. Like the bad ass you are. Sober gal summer is a mindset. It's an attitude. It's [00:06:00] an elevated self care regime and rewards. It's a celebration, honoring yourself, honoring your strength, honoring your perseverance, being proud of your accomplishments.
It is a mission of empowerment because we need more of that. As we get older, we need more of that. As we let go of alcohol, as we resolve our past, as we look at what's next in this next chapter of life, we need more building ourselves up rather than breaking ourselves down. Hashtag sober gal summer. By the way.
Hopefully this summer, I haven't seen this for such a long time, and this is just a little bit off because I wasn't planning on even saying this, but I will create this hashtag and I will eventually get back on Instagram with it. And I'm hoping sooner rather than later. So this is one of the things that I'm working on this summer.
So if you're on Instagram, you go and follow me. You're not going to see any posts right now, but they're coming your way. Again, hashtag SoberGalSummer. I like [00:07:00] that hashtag. Here are a few of the ins and outs of SoberGalSummer. Again, this is in. I'm focusing on this. Out. I am not focusing on this anymore. So you get a better idea.
In. Plan A. All in on you and your alcohol free lifestyle. That is what plan A is. All in on what you want more than alcohol, which is spending your resources, your time and your energy into building a new experience for yourself, creating and designing and tending to this lifestyle because that's what it takes and it's a lifestyle that allows you to choose yourself first.
Out. Plan B, which stands for but. I don't want to drink. It's a nice day out. I'm so tired of drinking. But. I need relief from stress. I don't want to drink just a little. I played the moderation game. I don't want to do that, but it's been 45 days since I've had a drink, so maybe I can try again. There is a plan [00:08:00] B and plan A and that's a backup plan.
That's having support. That's having other people around you who get where you're coming from when you want to say but with your plan B. Everything that you can think of that starts with but Is plan B and it's out this summer in investing in yourself better experiences Next level rewards both tangible and free freedom from alcohol is the next level reward.
That's it out Investing in alcohol, your precious time, your precious energy, your money that you work so hard for into drinking. It's out. It's not rewarding anymore, is it? Sober gals put their time and their energy and their money into high quality experiences and rewards, skincare, clothing, nutrition, travel, and the best free rewards, peace, pride, happiness, joy, and joy.
[00:09:00] Better communication and really being present in this one and only summer of 2024 and in our daily lives. So precious, especially as we get older, we realized, goodness, where is the time going? Sobergale, it's almost July 1st. Where has the time gone? It seems like we just kicked off 2024. The money I spent on alcohol, thousands of dollars.
It was upwards of a couple of hundred dollars a week for a while. Then when I was doing the moderation thing, it was maybe 400 a month. A lot of money. And where is it going? It was going into making me feel like crap and wanting to beat myself up. It's not anything that I value. How about you? The time I spent thinking about drinking, planning my activities around alcohol, and then drinking and feeling the aftermath, my energy tank out.
So out. I'm so done. In, taking action, having everything figured out before you start. [00:10:00] I know you want to figure it all out. I know you want to have all of the answers. We cannot control the outcome. We don't know what's going to happen. There's a lot of uncertainty. I get the fear in that. How about we just take action today?
We just start. In, saying no when you want to say no. Out, saying yes when you want to say no. And we'll leave it. In, taking action. BFF status, with yourself, out, mean girl status, building yourself up, talking to yourself like you would a friend, talking to somebody who is a human and makes mistakes and doesn't do everything perfectly and really is learning how to be more flexible and kind with herself.
And being with awkwardness to find comfortability. Out drinking not to feel awkward. There are going to be awkward moments, but if we keep drinking to manage these awkward moments in life, we're never going to be comfortable with being awkward. I'm awkward all the time. I want [00:11:00] to be awkward. Yeah, that's it.
In morning rituals, out hangover rituals. Oh, my hangover rituals were long. It was a day. Then as I got older, two days. Veering into two and a half, I would feel down. I would want to lay down. I wouldn't be able to focus towards the end. I was canceling jobs. I had my own business. I was barely functioning. I was no offense to anybody who eats hot dogs for lunch, but I was eating like two, four hot dogs.
I'll have a good hot dog. That sounds really good right now. Actually, I'm hungry. Uh, I would boil them. Like old school, like my mom would boil hot dogs and I would just line them up, then I would eat a bunch of chips and then I would feel, oh, so much worse. Yeah. My hangover rituals were very long. My morning ritual, this morning, it's a Sunday morning, just spent about two hours in my morning ritual and it felt good.
I feel [00:12:00] energized. I feel ready for the day. So in morning rituals out, by hangover rituals, I am holding my middle finger up to you in time spent pampering yourself with that elevated self care regime. When you get excited for, when you start researching, how can I do certain things with my evening routine and my morning routine?
What can I invest in? Maybe some new towels for my baths. Maybe some new sheets for my sleep. Maybe a really cool new journal or a planner that I can really spend time planning out my me time each week. Ooh, doesn't that sound so lovely? Pampering yourself, loving and becoming obsessed with caring for yourself.
Out time spent feeling low energy because of your drinking time spent not wanting to do any kind of self care, not getting up in the morning, not going on walks that you enjoy doing that [00:13:00] really gets you centered for the day, not doing your breathing and your meditation, not doing anything at night. When I was drinking, didn't even brush my teeth, wouldn't wash my face.
I'd wake up and go, Oh God. Oh, there's mascara under my eyes. Uh, no, I'm talking next level. Sober gals. We get obsessed with self care, self care queens, high vibe energy, alcohol can't touch us. Next thing, in hot sober gal summer walks, walking tall, we're walking together as a community with confidence. With positivity, we're starting our stuff in an area that brings us motivation.
We're listening to things that are positive and uplifting and we're hot and we could be hot because it's summer or, or hot flashes, but we're really, cause it's a mindset. Remember that's in hot summer, gal summer walks [00:14:00] out sitting anywhere, drinking alcohol, patio bars, outdoor dining. Outdoor concerts, couch, that was my favorite, on the couch, sitting anywhere, drinking alcohol.
I have a few ins and outs from some of the sober gals inside Team Alcohol Free. There's a thing going on here. Meg said, in taking care of myself, taking care of everything and everyone else. Missy said, in leaving the past behind, out dwelling on past mistakes. Melissa said, in letting go, out overthinking.
It's amazing. It's amazing. Maria said in puttering around my house and garden out people who I used to have to drink to endure. Mmm. I felt that one. Jess in letting other people figure things out for themselves out being endlessly available. You're available, but you're [00:15:00] available for yourself and what you want to do, including not doing a damn thing.
That is something. I want to talk about this for a minute. I'm available. Like, I don't have anything to do, and that's one of those challenges in sobriety as well. It's like, what am I going to do with my time? Giving yourself more availability to really figure out what you want to do with this next stage of your life.
Having more availability to ponder. And reflect what you want to do at this stage of your life going forward, having more time to be available to dip your toes in the pool or walk on the beach, having more time to doodle the color, to paint, put together an art journal for your sober summer, which that's happening over here.
And I'm really excited for that little project that I'm adding to my sober gal summer. Let's be available for us and see what comes up. In our minds, there is this theme, more about our own needs first, less about others needs first. Hashtag sober gal summer. [00:16:00] These are just some of the ins and outs. I can really go on forever with this.
And I actually have, because I have a whole document that I'm going to be sharing throughout the summer filled with ins and outs, but I want to encourage you to create your own sober gal summer in and out list, and I have created a free PDF for you, click on it. In the episode show notes, you do not have to sign up for email or anything.
You will get the vibe of sober gal summer because you will see the picture that is included on this PDF and fill out your own in and out list. I always love to hear from you. You can email me at hello, Laurie at Laurie massacot. com. Just subject line in out and just boom. That's it in share what it is out.
Share what it is. I'd love to hear from you. So after listening to this. message, this mission, Sober Gals Summer, and maybe you're at that place where you are just thinking, Hmm, I was about to write myself that drinking pass. I was about to put in force, plan B. I am there. I understand how that feels, and I am [00:17:00] never discounting.
The challenge of that, I never want to come here and say, this is going to be easy to do this kind of stuff. And if you've been listening for a while, you know, that I never say that, but also can we lighten up? And I do feel like summer is a time where we can lighten up a little bit. I am going to be working my tail off in July, but I really want to plan on taking most of August to just be with my community.
going to Maui for a week and having some downtime for myself before we go into the fall. It just feels lighter this summer, more than it has in the past few summers for me, for sure. It's challenging, but can we make it lighter? I know that we can, and it's going to be my mission to come here with y'all for the next four or five weeks to really carry this mission forward for you if you're ready.
To make this the summer of you, I have declared this the summer of Lori hashtag summer of Lori. I'm going to be sharing my workouts, my nutrition, my skincare regime, and [00:18:00] how I'm documenting my summer inside Team Alcohol Free. And I'm going to be sharing a little bit of this with you over the course of the next five weeks during our Sober Gal Summer episodes that are coming your way.
If you're ready to pour into yourself, not a wine glass this summer, drench yourself in elevated self care and love and support for choosing yourself and what you want for your More than alcohol. I'm with you. And if you're really ready to make this one and only summer of 2024, all about you, join us inside team alcohol free and get that inspiration, support, and fun you deserve the summer inside the team.
We are kicking off our first annual sober gal summer camp. On July 15th, the cool thing about the team, this is what I will say with community. And I've been coaching groups since 2018. I have had 30 day groups, six week groups. I've had another membership where we went month to month. I wanted to make this a place for women who want to go all in, who want to invest.
It's a one time payment. It's not [00:19:00] annual or monthly subscription. It's not six weeks or three months. It's a one time payment for a long term plan because that's what we're all missing. We're all missing so much of the maintenance and staying alcohol free, no matter if you've been alcohol free for two years or five years or two days, we all need support and community to rally around us and women who say.
I get you and I've got your back. There is a worry about what will happen after six weeks is up because we're in it for the long haul. We will walk side by side in our own lanes while standing taller and moving farther together as a community. There are so many fun new things happening throughout the next couple of months.
So if you are ready to join. Have me as your coach, get in there and get support. Go and check out the enrollment page linked below in the show notes to see what's new enrollment will close on July 31st and will not open again until the fall, wherever you are in the world and in the season and on your alcohol free road, take the sober gal mindset, [00:20:00] attitude and mission with you.
You're a very. Very powerful gal. You're very special. You are doing this work. Not a lot of people get to this point. We're even listening to a podcast about sober gal Summer. I want you to be proud of yourself today. I want you to celebrate yourself, and I want you to strut your sober self with confidence.
I am with you. I'll be back with a brand new episode next week. I've got an episode to help you prepare for an alcohol free vacation. Yay. Enjoy your week. Take care of yourself, my friend. Peace.
Hey, there! I’m Lori, the host of the To 50 and Beyond podcast.
Where aging and living alcohol-free are celebrated.
To 50 and Beyond is about self-discovery, living for today, and designing an alcohol-free life that alcohol can’t compete with.
I’m with you.
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