How to Do an End of Year Check-In
#337
Picture us sitting down with our favorite beverage and notebooks, and I ask you: What do you want to focus on and not focus on before the clock strikes midnight on 1/1/2026?
It's a question I asked myself before I recorded this episode, and this is what we're talking about today!
I share a letter I wrote to myself on 12/31/24 with my goals and dreams for 2025.
I talk about what is working in my life that I want to continue to focus on in 2025, a few things I want to start, and something I want to let go of and not focus on.
Throughout the episode, I check in with you to help you get clear on the progress you've made, the things you are doing that are working in your life, and what you want to spend your time focusing on and not focus on for the remainder of the year.
I have a correction:
I mentioned SMART goals and incorrectly used the acronym. The correct meaning is: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Bound. Thank you for allowing me to be human and make mistakes 😊.
Thank you for listening!
Mentioned in this episode:
Join The Moment (bi-weekly newsletter)
Cheryl Coulombe's challenges I've done this year (and am doing)
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Hey, there I am, Lori. Welcome to To 50 and Beyond where we talk about midlife and living alcohol free later in life. I'm giving you a big virtual hug from Foggy San Diego. I just poured my first cup of coffee for the morning. I've got my happy Halloween cup with doggies, with costumes on the front. I was down there in the kitchen making my coffee, and I was doing my stretches and I had my creatine and I put my collagen in my coffee and I'm all set to go.
I've got my water. 5:10 AM and I'm thinking on my agenda this morning is to sit down and to review where I am at the end of the year and to plan what I wanna focus on and not focus on for the next three months. And I thought, oh, I wanna do this in real time on a podcast. And so this is what we're doing today.
I am going for it. 'cause my word of the year, which I forgot in 2025, is go. And I'm gonna go for it. I'm gonna record this episode with you like we are having coffee, and I ask you, what is one thing you wanna focus on for the remainder of the year? What is one thing that you don't wanna focus on? I'm gonna go through a little bit of how I get clear on what I wanna focus on in the year.
I write a letter to myself at the end of the year, so I have one dated. December 31st, 2024, and it is to me on December 31st, 2025. I've been doing this for quite a long time and it is a way for me to just sit down and dream. And just write down things that I wanna do and then I am doing. And so it starts off with, dear Lori, I am so proud of you.
This is what you've done, da, da, da da. This letter is about two and a half pages, almost three, pretty much. I check in with it throughout the year. I keep it in my journal. So this is something that interests you. I'll share a little bit of this letter with you. Mm-hmm. And I'll let you know then how I go through the process of like, okay, do I wanna do this?
If so, why? If not, let it go, release it, and then follow up with is there anything that you wanna leave for later so you can get clear and you can get hyper-focused? 'cause we have three months left and you can accomplish a lot in three months as long as you know what you want to work on. Looking back at this letter, it's a lot of personal things.
Typically over the last seven plus years, it's been a lot of business stuff. So I recognized this morning after looking at this letter, before I started recording this episode, that there are some business things that I wanna take care of. So I'm gonna do that a little bit lighter and get clear on that because there's things that are happening inside my business, my community, my coaching that I want to get clear on.
And on the podcast. Why do we wanna do this? Let's check in. There. Just having this check-in and getting clear on where you're spending your time and energy. Maybe asking yourself, is this what I value in my life or is there something else that I value more that I wanna go for? Reminding yourself that you can do it, but checking in at this time of year, October 1st is when this episode airs the.
Younger Lori would have checked out around this time of year, but she always started the year with a New year's resolution, a vision board, something creative, because I love that. The last week of the year is always my favorite year. It still is, but I would check out. It's the holidays typically on my resolution list was to lose weight.
It seemed to always be 25 pounds to lose. 25 pounds. Start exercising. Save money. It was the same stuff year after year and then towards the end of my drinking the last two years, I was so worried about my drinking that I was okay. I need to take a break from drinking. So I started to worry about my drinking around 2011, 2012 and 2013.
I did my very own dry January. Didn't know of dry January. It actually had just started in 2013, and so I did that in January. I took those breaks. So at the end of the year I thought myself, check in with yourself on this too. You cannot lose weight. You cannot save money. You definitely can't stop drinking because it's the holidays.
That's not what we do, and what I would end up with by the end of the year is more weight, literally less money in my bank account, literally feeling stressed and anxious because of that. I remember at the end of the year, 2012, and going into January of 2013, I felt so bad about myself and my drinking. I was worried about what.
Everything meant, and I just knew that I had to take a break that year. I lasted 45 days without alcohol until I gave in at a family brunch, and then I eventually stopped drinking August 11th, 2013. So I don't wanna add more of the stuff I don't want in my life in the next three months and have to start something.
That I've been wanting to do in January, because January for me now is more about easing in. I don't start anything new until maybe mid-January or February, and I'm good with that. So check in with yourself if you're telling yourself that, and especially if you're somebody who is working on living alcohol free, you're doing the work.
First of all, I wanna just say I see you and I am proud of you, and it's never too late to start. It's gotta be your time though to do these types of things. So I wanna just give you a big old permission slip today to do you boo. And whatever you wanna focus on for the rest of the year and however you wanna plan it out.
Uh, if you like to set a goal, you know, smart goals. Um, smart goals are, I don't have my phone to Google it. Specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, timely. I think that's what it is, but if it's not, Google it. See what it is. Uh, but if you wanna get really specific about a goal and set a time to it, do that for me, the letter just helps me guide myself in the direction that I wanna go, and I go into it with the expectation when I'm writing this letter that not everything is gonna get done.
And that's okay. It's good to have a dream. It's good to dream a little bit. Bigger and just remind yourself that you can, and you will do it if that's what you want. So I'll weed through this, uh, lovely letter and tell you how I break it down and the things that I'm letting go of and the things that I wanna focus on.
Grab a notebook or a journal or just a blank piece of paper and you can go through and write some things down. Get some inspiration from me reading bits of this letter. I have my notebook in front of me. I started to write down some things yesterday because I knew I was gonna be doing it this morning.
Actually, I'm gonna link this notebook that I've been using in this. Notes, I got it on Amazon. Uh, I'm a notebook connoisseur, and I'm always in search of a good notebook, and I think this is it for me. I think I found my notebook. I hope they never discontinue. This is my third one this year. Let me tell you about this notebook.
It's hardcover, it's spiral bound. It's thick lined pages. There's content pages, so you can write down the page number and the topic that you're writing about, and it's big. It's not eight and a half by 11. It's a little bit less than that. I'm not sure the measurements, but I absolutely love it. The one thing that I don't like about it, oh, and it has a little pin carrier in it, so I could put my pin in it.
The only thing I don't like about it is it can get fingerprints. On the front, but you just take a little bit of a all purpose cleaner and wipe that down. There's my commercial for the notebook. I'm gonna put it in the show notes. Okay, so let's get started. You can start this letter writing if you would like to do that.
I love just starting off with how I did, dear Lori, I'm proud of you. And then letting it flow. And the reason that. I go back and review this letter is to just look at if I'm headed in the right direction. And so that's what I did for this letter. I pulled out some things that I wanna do, and one of those things is to be more present in my life and to document my daily life and to create art.
And in this letter. Apparently in 2025 you have given yourself a newfound sense of energy and space to do the things you want to do. You make art daily, you are hanging it on the walls and cherishing it. You've gone back to the creative spirit you had as a kid and you are loving it. Paper glue and paint and pins light up your afternoons and evenings.
I love that. I haven't done it, but that's what I wanna focus on. I pulled out all of my art supplies because all of that is true. It's really easy to do. I used to scrapbook. If you listen to the podcast, I've heard from a lot of you who said I scrapbook too. Um. I used to scrapbook while I was drinking.
After I stopped drinking, I felt like I had just no creative juices, and that's not true. I'm a creative person. I've dabbled in it over the years, but I am going to get into it. This is something that I wanna do because I do wanna be more present in my life and. In the things that happen daily. I wanna write about 'em.
I wanna take pictures of it, and I wanna put it in a book so I can go back and go, oh my gosh, all of these moments are happening in your life and I think you were missing out on them. Oh, if you're on my email list, I sent out an email a few weeks ago about this topic, living in the moment and what I wanna focus on and being more present in my life, and not just saying it, but doing it.
And I've started a new newsletter. It's actually going out this week. I pause. I stumble on the word newsletter. I've resisted it. It's a newsletter. I can't think of another word for it. It's gonna be twice a month, and it's called The Moment. So if you're on my email and you're getting emails from me in the past, or you've signed up for the Daily Sobriety toolkit, you will get this email.
If not, if. The link will be in the show notes to sign up for this. Um, one of the other things that is in this letter, the big thing that I did and that I don't want to just pass by, I recognized it. I'm processing it. I'm in, it was making the move to a different location in San Diego and having roots and feeling settled in a home.
That's what we did. In June, I started to recognize the fact. That I was doing some worrying about the future and I was future tripping. I could hear my mom saying, Lori, Michelle, stop worrying about everything. Uh, I was doing that a lot during the summer, June, July, and I was out on a walk in this brand new location that brings me so much peace.
I love it so much. It's so pretty. And where we were before. Was more in the city. It was noisy and just the quiet. And I was out walking one morning and I was thinking about the day ahead, thinking about noon, thinking about three o'clock, the my appointments, things that I had going on, and I said to myself out loud enough.
Enough, just like I did the night that I stopped drinking. I heard a voice that said, you've had enough alcohol for two lifetimes. I said to myself that morning enough. I'm so tired of it. I'm so over it. You cannot control what's gonna happen this afternoon and you don't have to worry about anything. Be here now with yourself.
Be in this moment and start looking around, start paying attention to yourself. I snapped myself out of it. I had a difficult end to last year, the beginning of this year, I had anxiety about the move, and so I give myself a break for that kind of stuff, but it was just that moment where I said, I'm done.
I'm not doing this anymore. And so. Focusing on the rest of the years being more present, documenting the moments in my life, getting back into that paper and glue and crafting, and then celebrating the fact that we did move. Is there that thing in your life? That's what I would wanna know from you. Where you wanted to reach this thing that you wanted to do big or small.
And then you do it and it's just like, ah, that wasn't a big deal, but before you did it, it was a really big deal. If you do that, you're not alone. I do it. Take a moment and process that. Take a walk with yourself and reflect on it. Give yourself a yay, me an atta girl. I'm so proud of you for doing this thing.
It could be a small thing or a big thing, or anything in between. I don't just wanna move on from these. Things that, my goodness, I thought was such a big deal before, and just say No, it's not moving on to the next thing. No. I wanna be here with it for a bit and be in awe of it and be in awe of myself for being able to do it.
And I'm not just talking about the move, I'm talking about other things in my life as well. 'cause the move was collaborative with family for sure. Um. Okay. So that's what I wanna say on that. So those are things that I wanna focus on being more in the moment and making art in that newsletter. I'm going to share my art journal as I go.
So again, if you're in there, you will see it. 'cause that is gonna be my accountability. I love accountability and I need it. Another thing that I wrote that I wanna talk about in this letter, and to give you an idea of some of the things that I have done this year and that I will continue doing. The things that are working for me, uh, it's kind of funny.
Am I gonna read this whole blurb? Yes, I will. I wrote you have finally found a way to color your hair to cut down on expensive salon visits. You go to Great Clips, which is like a little haircut place here in Southern California for your haircut. 25 bucks. You leave with at least $80 in your pocket. Take care of your skin by cutting down on stress, weightlifting, walking 15,000 steps a day.
Prioritizing sleep. You stick with the basics for your skincare. You love your castor oil and water throughout the day. I don't drink castor oil. I put a little bit on my face. Uh, your nutrition is not perfect, but you eat in a way that makes you feel alive and not like you're depriving yourself. This next part, you have fallen in love with cooking and makes simple dishes that everyone enjoys.
This has saves so much time and gives bill nights off from cooking all of the time. This is what I wanna say about this. I did say weightlifting four times a week. I don't know if I read that part. I think I just said weightlifting. I have found a program that I absolutely love and that works so well for me that I made so much progress in just changing my body composition this year because at 57 it's harder to do, and if you're hearing the information, eat more protein lift heavier.
This weightlifting program, I'm gonna link it in the show notes. She has a YouTube channel as well. Her name is Cheryl Collum. She's also on Instagram. She runs six week challenges, and I'm on my fifth one right now. So I've been doing it since February or March, and I love them because they're three times a week.
I was going to the gym before this six times a week, seeing no progress at all. So I knew that I needed. A coach, I needed guidance, I needed a community. There's a big community on there and they give me a lot of motivation and inspiration, these women who are lifting super heavy. So I started doing that.
It's like, man, I really simplified my schedule. I've lift three times a week, 45 to 60 minutes, and then the rest of it is movement walking. She says, walk. Motion is lotion. I love that saying. So that's what I do. That has worked very well for me. I'm gonna continue doing that. I started tracking my nutrition.
I have to track my food and I started using the Weight Watchers app around this time. It works for me. I don't do the points as much as I do the macros 'cause you can do both on Weight Watchers and I do go to Great Clips and get my hair cut. Last time I went into a salon, I walked out $416. Less in my pocket and orange roots.
I called and the next day and I said, you know, I think I gotta come back. But I was there for like four hours. I didn't wanna go back. I made the appointment and then I ended up canceling it. Let them grow out. And now here we are. I do a demo permanent color on my hair. I can't say that I love it, but for right now, that's good for me.
So yay, I did this stuff. But I haven't fallen in love with cooking. I'm gonna go ahead and leave that. I don't know if I need to fall in love with cooking. I like simple food. I eat the same stuff every day. That's how I am able to maintain the weight that I'm at. And Bill enjoys cooking. Maybe I should double check with him on that, but he's been cooking throughout our whole time together and we've been together 28.
Almost 29 years. I'll check in with him on that because I think that's just a nice thing to do. Um, but if I do cook, it's just very simple stuff and it's not like I never cook, but I don't think that I need to fall in love with cooking. I think I'm good there, so I'm going to. Let that one go. So I look at it as, okay, the things that working for me, I'm gonna keep anything that I wanna do.
Am I going to do it within the next month, the next two months, the next three months, writing them down? This for me is going to be those business related things that I need to do, and I am going to set, not a deadline, but, uh. Yay, it's done. Line. Yay me. I got it done. Because I envision myself at the end of the year having a couple weeks off in December.
That's motivating to me. So if there's something on your list that is working for you, keep doing it. There's something that you wanna try. Write it out and say, this is what I wanna focus on, this is why I wanna focus on it. And then if there's anything, like with me, you have fallen in love with cooking, letting it go.
You just let it go, you release. It's like, it's okay. I either started off wanting this, I changed. It's not something that I really value in my life. And then I also look at some of these things that I still wanna do, but I'm not gonna get done at the end of the year. So I put it on a save it for later.
List, and that's something that I can revisit at the end of the year when I write my 2026 letter. One of the other things that I'm not going to let go, but I know a lot of it is gonna get done in 2026, is I wrote, you were creating a home that matches your needs and style. You have made it so cozy and classic in a place where you all feel loved and comforted.
That hasn't happened yet. It's not real cozy because there's a lot of things that we wanna do with the home, but I will make it cozy for the holidays for sure, and that's gonna be good enough for me. And then I'll get into some more projects around here in 2026. I thought we were gonna do it in 2025, but that's because I just changed my mind.
I don't want to brush into things. I wanna live in a place where I can get the vision and be in it, and then decide what I wanna do. I don't know about you, but it takes me a long time to process certain things. The processing part of it, I'm okay with it now. I need more time. And then I also need to check in with my expectations.
That's also something like going back to, or these things that I wanna focus on realistic, if they are, go for it, is this thing that I don't wanna focus on,, realistic then. Go for it. One more thing that I wanted to talk about before I wrap this up is a looking forward list and writing things down that you're gonna look forward to during the holiday season.
I know it's a difficult time for a lot of us, and if you're out there and you are living this alcohol free lifestyle and you have any concerns about it, get it out on paper, write it down, and then say. What am I looking forward to? If there's a challenge here? What is the opportunity for me that first holiday?
Ooh. I was concerned about the fact that, I wouldn't be able to do it. I told myself that, you know, s. Quitting drinking in August and then I've got Thanksgiving, my favorite drinking holiday right around the corner. You're never gonna be able to do it. And that first year was not fun and I didn't enjoy it.
We did something totally different. We went to a movie and went out to dinner and I didn't like it. But the next year I enjoyed it. But if there's any concerns there for you, just write it down and see the opportunity and not drinking during the holiday and write down anything that you're looking forward to.
And it could start with not drinking during the holiday. I'm looking forward. Just the simple things. I'm looking forward to cooler days and cozy weather and coffee in the morning and slower mornings. I'm waking up to an alarm now. I haven't done that in years. I've changed. I've changed this year and I see this change and that's why I'm acknowledging it today.
And I know you've changed too. I know there are things that you're not pulling out, and I hope this episode helps you pull them out. I'm really looking forward to the simplicity. Family and friends and the holiday season and working. I really am. I just got back from a wonderful trip in Park City, Utah last week.
I went to Utah for the first time with some members of my community team, alcohol free. We had such a great time together and I knew that I was gonna come off of that trip, feeling energized, feeling inspired, and that's exactly what happened. I have more clarity than when I went and I told everyone that I just feel clearer now, and the way that I ended.
This letter from last year was, the sky is the limit for you. And I'm gonna say that to you and I'm gonna say it to me. We can do anything. And then I wrote, dream Bigger for 2026. You've got this. Love you, Lori. Yeah. Dream bigger. It's okay. You gotta give yourself permission to do that. Do it today. I love you so much.
Thank you so much for listening today. Remember, if you wanna get on the email the moment, if you wanna join Team Alcohol free, our community is open right now. I will be closing enrollment at some point, probably the end of October, and opening it back up in December for the new year. But I'm gonna be doing some retooling over there.
Some new stuff. I'm excited for that, and if you wanna work with me privately, I do have spaces open for private coaching six weeks, so you can check that out also in the show notes. I will see you next week. You wanna reach out to me about what you're focusing on and not focusing on for the end of the year.
Send me an email. I would love to hear from you. Take care my friend. Peace.
Hey, there! I’m Lori, the host of the To 50 and Beyond podcast.
Where aging and living alcohol-free is an advantage, not a limitation.
To 50 and Beyond is about self-discovery, aging well on your terms, and designing an alcohol-free life that alcohol doesn’t stand a chance against.
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