The Blog

Chaos is a complete disorder and confusion; it mayhem, disorganization, Chaos, and disruption in midlife. I say Chaos has no place in the middle of life or sobriety.

2020 has been a whirlwind. From the pandemic to the murder of George Floyd, and racial injustice happening every time we turn around, we live in a world of disarray. 

To control what we can in our lives and unplug from negative energy and behaviors and people who add madness to our life is a must right now. 

As I decided to record an episode about removing drama and Chaos, I came off of a chaotic experience in my life. This experience added to the stress to 2020, now that it's over, I feel as though I can breathe better, think better, and create more freely. 

The first half of 2020 has taught me how to re-prioritize and get quiet. Some of the things I was worried about and thought that I needed to do in January, just don't matter now. 

There is...

If you are trying to come to terms with your drinking in the middle of life, you are in the right place. Drinking isn't the same as it used to be, and your mind and body are changing, can alcohol co-exist in midlife? 

I was a go-all-in drinker. From the time I took my first sip at fourteen to my last sip at forty-five, I pounded beer, wine, and champagne; lot's of time all three together. 

At forty-five, during perimenopause, I began to ask myself (regularly), how much is too much, and will it ever be enough?

I tried making rules only to drink red wine, not my beloved Chardonnay. 

I tried drinking only on Saturday even though Sunday was my most favorite day to get drunk. Also, Friday. 

I tried to convince myself that I didn't have a "problem" and that everyone drank. 

I tried believing my excuses and justifications, but they were no longer convincing. 

I tried. 

I tried to make "alcohol...

Changing careers and her relationship with alcohol to pivot midlife is the topic of Episode 121 of the To 50 and Beyond podcast, with Juju Hook. 

Juju Hook, consultant, coach, and speaker.  Juju shares how her drinking was showing up in binge drinking, seeing an addiction coach, and how he helped her change her relationship with alcohol, taking naltrexone to curb her pleasure from alcohol and drinking.

As women in the middle of life, we are searching for purpose and answers to questions that we didn't ask when we were younger.

Juju talks about how she went through a crisis in her late forties and made the decision to change her future by pivoting into a new career as a coach, consultant, and speaker. 

Juju shares how to build a brand with soul and purpose, and what it means to be a Prime Time woman, branding and social media and change your brand even if you don’t have a business, and social media tips for the PT gal

...

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FOMO in the middle of life takes on a new meaning. The biggest question is not what you will miss out on if (fill in the blank) but what you will miss out on in life if you don't (fill in the blank.) 

In episode 120 of the To 50 and Beyond podcast, I talk about the fear when I quit drinking and challenging belief's that alcohol is fun in midlife and how to lean into fear instead of embrace it to start living your desired life.

The Fear of Missing Out overall is a feeling that you are not included. 

The inclusion of people of all races, sexual preferences, and people who don't have the physical capability to do what I can do. I don't want to ever take anything for granted - this year has changed me, but I don't know the realm of the change, and that's okay. 

Inclusion coincides with the questions I have been asking myself to learn about my privilege and where I've...

Manifesting the life you want and deserve works! Think about this, you focus on bad stuff happening, and they happen, so why not focus on great things and make those happen too! 

My guest on episode 118 of the To 50 and Beyond podcast is Jerilynn Stephens, author of the new book, The Five "F" Words to Manifesting Your Life. 

Jerilynn has been consciously manifesting the life of her dreams for the last sixteen years. It was through study, practice, and patience that she decoded the keys to manifestation. During a particularly rough time of struggling with alcohol, she hit rock bottom and picked up a book that introduced her to the world of co-creating with the Universe. 

Jerilynn walks you through how manifestation can change your life by using the five "F" words: 

1. Figure 
2. Focus
3. Fearless Action
4. Feel It 
5. Faith 

Jerilynn talks about how you must figure out what you want to manifest your desires....

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In episode 117 of the To 50 and Beyond podcast - I talk about the physical, psychological, and social effects that stem from a long period of alcohol consumption and answer a question for a listener. 

Do you think alcohol makes you age faster? I feel like my face is changing daily - I workout, eat well, take vitamins, and use expensive skincare - is it the alcohol?! 

Brace yourself for the answer; yes! 

The apparent reason why is because alcohol is a diuretic, and it dehydrates you. It has both stimulating effects and sedating effects, so it disrupts your sleep - two of the biggest factors to looking older than you are. 

You get up in the morning tired and try vs. rested and moisturized. I don't know about you, but I will take rested and moisturized any day! 

When I was in my early forties, I woke up one morning and...

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Maybe you've had a bad day, a bad week, or a bad year, that doesn't mean you are in crisis mode. Let's leave the crisis back in the 60s and move into the present time, showing up as midlife women who can handle anything, especially a crisis. 

The beautiful Valerie Albarda, founder of Midlife A -Go-Go joins me in Episode 116 of the To 50 and Beyond podcast.  Valerie shares her journey through perimenopause, how she has learned to listen to her body, and respect herself, facing her fears to challenge herself, getting back into the workforce at fifty-five, and taking the crisis out of aging.

Topics discussed: 

• Putting age into perspective 
• Debunking the myths of midlife 
• Facing her fears and trying out to be a TedX speaker
• Bad things happen at any stage of life - it's not a crisis! 
• Exploring the myth of the midlife crisis 
• PVC's in...

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Recovery from alcohol addiction brings hope, healing, and a chance to start again. Jennifer Golden is living proof that you can change your life and change your relationships once you get sober. For a long time, Jennifer lived a life where every ounce of energy she went to drinking alcohol. 

Jennifer's life revolved around when, where, how, and how much she could drink. But on August 12, 2015, she woke up, looked in the mirror, and said NO MORE. She joined the local gym and found that working out took her mind off of drinking. So she kept going every day. She is now 4 1/2 years sober, and the blessings keep coming! She loves to share my purpose in her story to help others who are suffering because you aren't alone, and we do recover. 

Jennifer is a mom to a 12-year-old boy, works full time in the garbage industry, and is an independent representative for an Activewear company...

When I started the To 50 & Beyond podcast in 2018, I had a tagline that read: This Is Not Your Mom's Midlife.  I wanted to start a podcast for women over 40 to talk about topics that are typically hush-hush like aging, menopause, weight, over-drinking, and so on. To put an end to stigma and stereotypes that say women are irrelevant over a certain age.

I've created a podcast that represents women in the middle of life because, let's face it, it's a challenging time, and it's a joyful time. I talk about the midlife umbrella and all of the topics that fall underneath like: 

1. Perimenopause Anxiety
2. Fulfilling Careers or shifts in careers
3. Menopause support 
4. Nutrition and weight management
5. What kind of exercise we should be doing
6. Aging Gracefully (I'm still figuring this one out) 
7. Empty Nest 
8. Financial loss and gain
9. Sadness and grieving
10. Beauty and skincare 
11. Overall health and wellness so we thrive
12. ...

The following is a compilation of frequently asked questions that I receive from women all over the world who are tired of drinking and ready to explore what else life has to offer. Women over 40 who are questioning their drinking and trying to make it work. 

I know where you are, you are questioning your drinking and wondering What will life be like if I don't drink? Your brain wants to tell you, you can't, you shouldn't, life will be boring and you will be left out. 

To quit drinking is a commitment to yourself that happens in a span of a few minutes. Many women over 40 who I talk to think that it takes years to stop drinking; it doesn't. Spending years in recovery and healing and connecting to who you are again; alcohol-free is the process of sobriety. 

I want to tell you that I never thought I would adapt to being sober after drinking for thirty-years. Alcohol was a big part of who I thought I was and what I thought I...